I Need an Editor, Pronto!

The World is Flat
By: Thomas L. Friedman
Probably the most popular business/internet/global issues book of the last few years, The World is Flat has some very interesting ideas on just how small our world is getting. Lots of great interviews, lots of great information, and lots of great new takes on the world today.
So then why on Earth did I have to force myself not to scream every time I read the book?
I agree with nearly all of it's tenements about how the internet and all the new technology that has come from it has reshaped our world had such a drastic rate that we can't control it. (Personally, I think this is part of the reason we have hit this resession. We lost control.) So, yes, I believe the world is flat.
But goddamn, why did someone not find a better editor? I understand the man is a great reporter and columnist, but this book drove me crazy! While trying to down-to-earth speech, Friedman instead creates this wasted space and repetitive kind of talk. He adds in words to quotes that truly don't need it, often slightly changing their meaning and in many cases, not for the better of his argument. The phrase "The World is Flat" could have been said at least a thousand times less. And when he talks about himself, he continually reintroduces wasted space sentences that start to sound like a five year old babbling about his trip to the supermarket with mommy.
If a great editor, a real, olden day editor that actually knew how to write and create books, then this book would have been amazing and still have retained its down-to-earth quality. A snip here, a tuck there, and dear God, it would have Demi Moore bagging Ashton Kutcher. I wish editors were artists again, so that good books like this could actually be great books.
Otherwise, this good 650 page book is just 75% wasted space.

Keeps Getting Better

Blood Rites
Dresden Files Book 6
By: Jim Butcher
There are times when I really hate only having a part-time job. Like when one of the book series I'm reading gets really good, and I can't find the next book at Half Price Books (the greatest store in history).
So, alas, Blood Rites will have to suffice for now. And suffice it did.
I love large universerse with lots of characters and surprises that come out of left field (I have been a collector of comics for fifteen years now). As such, Butcher's Dresden Files just keep getting better and better, by the ever-evolving world he has created. Butcher manages to balance telling new stories, while slowing pulling back the veil on his wizard/broke PI hybrid Dresden's past and world. Each book offers something new on both the grander and character scheme, what ultimately makes these books awesome. (Laurell K. Hamilton, are you listening?)
I guess the sucess of this particular book depends on how much you like a certain secondary character, namely, a White Court (ie, non-blood sucking but sexy as hell) Vampire named Thomas. Thomas pulls up firmly as the new major second ringer in this book and by the end of the book, it looks like he's going to be around for a while. Frankly, I like Thomas. Butcher manages to portray nonhuman characters, well, nonhumanly and still believable, which is a much more difficult than non-writers imagine it to be. (Take a look at some Star Trek fanfiction, if you don't believe me.)
Anyways, a very good book in a series that just keeps getting better. I have no idea how many more books I have to go before I catch up to what's published, so hopefully I'll get a job soon and don't have to buy all my books at Half Price Books (which I love, but never seem to have the fantasy novels I want!)

Monday Moment: The Mother's Rage Edition

Molly Weasley vs. Bellatrix Lestrange in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
Momma Gonna Knock You Out
Just in case you haven't checked out my other blog, Stories Wanted (the link's been over the in the sidebar for about seven months now. Shame on you.), I recently covered the seventh Harry Potter book.
And basically cried from the beginning of the Battle of Hogwarts to the end. Now, just in case you haven't read the book since you bought it at midnight after waiting in lines for three hours last July, let me remind you that the Battle of Hogwarts is really about 100 pages in the book. And, apparently, the majority of the eighth movie (the seventh book will be made into two movies). So I was crying for quite some time.
And then, the moment that sparked jokes, critiques, and well, made Book Seven so damn good: Mrs. Weasley, the doting mother figure of the entire seven novel series, quite possibly the character that ties in all the major themes, and the one you least expect to kill anybody, because before now, all we've ever seen her do is make dinner, screams, "NOT MY DAUGHTER, YOU BITCH!" and basically annihiliates the hell outta Bellatrix Lestrange, the most evil woman in the books(well, that title might go to Umbridge - its debateable). The moment is pitch-perfect in character and tone (Rowling rarely uses caps), shocking for the character and reader, and basically prompts Harry into finishing off Voldemort once and for all.
I do believe the moment resonates so well is becase at that moment, that primal scream of fury, Molly Weasley is simply and utterly human. Rowling's magic has nothing to do with the magical world she created or even her amazing gift for naming, but for creating some of the most memorable and true characters of the last fifty years. Hollywood movies and the deluge of books on the market today can only create stories about superheroes, embarrassing people who still have great comedic timing, and people, let's face it, you'd probably run away from if you saw in a dark alley. But Mrs. Weasley, along with her entire family, and the rest of Rowling's sprawling cast of characters, comes off as a human being. And that's what makes the Harry Potter series so great.
I love that line of dialogue. Its definitely in my Top 10 list of the greatest lines of dialogues ever spoken.

KISS + Fantasy Nerds/Politically Incorrect Children = Comic Gold

Role Models
Staring: Seann William Scott, Paul Rudd, Christopher Mintz-Plasse, Bobb'e J. Thompson, Elizabeth Banks, & Jane Lynch
I really wasn't expecting much when I saw this movie. I do believe in all honesty, I went to see it over Madagascar 2, because of Seann William Scott's pecs. And that Paul Rudd is absolutely the funniest (and hot) guy around. So I was pleasantly surprised to realize this movie is actually really good.
There's some raunch, some sleaze, but mostly, its good and original comedy. I do believe I have to thank the screenwriters here (actually, its Rudd and partner David Wain), because the writing and the jokes were inspired. But more than that, the characters went through actually changes and conflicts, that well, were human. And real. And amazingly in these days of slapstick but stupid comedy (see: Scary Movie 4), the character changes are totally believable. And Rudd and Scott give equal weight to the easy jokes as to the emotional heartstring moments. Rudd shines in a very uncomfortable scene with he meets Mintz-Plasse's character's parents that utterly changes his character's direction. Totally right on.
And really, what can be better than seeing Rudd, Scott, and the kids dressed up as KISS to fight in a fantasy battle royale? And the fact that even when it looked like the movie was going to get too gooey, too Hollywood happy ending for everybody, somebody comes and stabs the movie in the back? Literally? Brilliance.
And frankly, let's give a hand to Jane Lynch, who steals every single second of screentime that she appears in. I've loved Lynch for her ability to disappear into the strangest of characters, but her former addict kiddie helping crazy woman is complex, funny, and oddly, human. In a lesser actress's hands, I do believe the character would have pushed the movie into that evil slapstack land we were talking about early. But Lynch delivered every single time.
I do believe Role Models is the funniest movie I've seen since 27 Dresses. So go see it. Now. Before its too late, and those all holidays show up. You know you want to.

Why Every 13 Year-Old Should Get a Vampire for Christmas

Twilight
Staring: Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Billy Burke, Ashley Greene, Nikki Reed, Jackson Rathbone, Kellan Lutz, Peter Facinelli, Cam Gigandet, Taylor Lautner, Anna Kendrick, Michael Welch, Christian Serratos, Gil Birmingham, & Elizabeth Reaser
I dig the supernatural. Even if you haphazardly glance at this blog (or my other ones), I do believe you'd realize this. I think vampires are interesting, and in my writerly opinion, can really be used for great effect in all sort of fun metaphors. Or good old-fashioned big and bloody fights.
Twilight, adapted from the hugely popular book series by Stephanie Meyer, is essentially a thirteen year-old's fantasy of vampires. I'm not calling Meyer immature or anything like that, but Pattinson's Edward and hell, even Gigandet's James (the villain of the piece) are some of the tamest (ie, human) vampires I've ever seen. There's no new vampire lore or interesting additions to the vampire genre (the biggest twist so far is the Native American connection), and beyond that, there's really only big fight in the whole movie. So, this isn't your everyday vampire fare.
But, seperated from that, I do have to say that I enjoyed the movie for the most part. Gigandet is solid villain, with lots of menacing stares, and Pattinson is being rightfully called a star now (although I think I like him as Cedric Diggory). Unfortunately, the overall movie and Bella's character seemed to sap the energy from Stewart. Stewart (who I have liked in other roles) is whiney, depressing, and a true to form damsel in distress. It is only in the few moments in the movie where Bella takes a stand for her own life does Stewart actually become more than a wallflower.
Visually, I truly did enjoy the movie. The colors were gorgeous, with the deep green and whites of the forest and mountains, and the blues of the school and town. The colors enhanced the movie's overall effect. But those voice overs were really awful. I hate book-to-movie adaptions with voice overs, because they're usually unneeded and take away from the beautiful scenery. I'd rather watch the action and figure it out for myself than have the main character tell me what's going on. If you want to do voice overs right, watch Grey's Anatomy for how to set tone and adding theme without ever once telling the audience what they're watching.
Overall, a pretty good movie. Its just enough to make me probably go out and read the books. But just barely.

Destiny Semi-Fulfilled

Destiny: Child of the Sky
Symphony of Ages Book 3
By: Elizabeth Haydon
The first book of this trilogy was met with general critical acclaim and commercial sucess. As such, six books have followed. Book 3 is about as far as I've gotten, and while I've enjoyed the series for the most part, I just really have to say that the ending of this book (the ending of the first trilogy) left me disappointed.
In high fantasy, there's always the heroes who are goign to fulfill a prophecy. That's the way JRR Tolkien set the genre up, and how so many of the others have followed. Now, there's this wonderful thing called genre-blending that is when authors take the best parts of several genres and shove them into a book (or series). Anita Blake? Originally, hard-broiled mystery meets horror. Now, erotica meets horror. Xena? Action mythology plus major camp. And Symphony of Ages was definitely teeming with pure high fantasy with a large dose of tortured historical romance. Genre-blending books get the benefit of two readerships and two sets of great cliches to borrow from, which often creates some new and interesting developments.
Sadly, while SofA started out this way, the first trilogy ended about 3/4 through the book, with a shiny happy wedding, and no conflict. The prophecy got fulfilled, yes, of course, with plenty of answers given, with the door for sequels slightly left ajar. But the climax was so..........
Boring. In high fantasy, that last battle has got to be stunning. And it should be right near the end. The reader has to be so enthralled that they simply cannot stop reading and end up falling asleep at 4 in the morning when they've got to get up for work at 6. (Which is why I try to avoid reading the ends of books late at night.)
But sadly, the final battle comes way to early, leaving the reader to ask what the hell the other two hundred pages are for (essentially, the romance side of the equation, which doesn't seem to fulfill the set-up of the first book). And the final battle is much, much too easy. For that much build up, there was comparatively little bloodshed and only slight emotional turmoil. Haydon committed the worst author offense: she failed to deliver on the promises she made to the reader.
This isn't to say the book wasn't good. There were some great moments of all varieties, including very beautiful, very touching, or very surprising. The dialogue is still good, and the characters are still interesting. But the ending was just plain disappointing.
Oddly, because so much of it was good, instead of making me want to give up on the series, I want to keep going. I truly believe this is because I don't feel like its over. That couldn't have been the end, because it just didn't feel big enough. Perhaps this was the way Haydon (or her editors) used to keep readers. I don't know. But in the end, its almost enough to make me pass-up the other three books. We'll have to see.

Monday Moment: The How To Make an Entrance Edition

Ugly Betty's When Betty met YETI
The Gay Man vs. Affirmative Action
Ugly Betty happens to be one of my favorite TV shows for the fact it can blend over the top humor with utterly real gut punches. And last Thursday's episode had so many moments that were perfect, that I just knew it was time for me to come crawling back to the Monday Moment.
Episode Primer: Betty (with two days to plan) and Marc (with months) compete for a spot in a young editors program. Betty wins.
First Moment: Marc's entrance. In a move worthy of Wilhelmina, Marc shows that he's just as smart (if not, perhaps, more business savvy), than Betty, by showing up with a full magazine, an entourage, and a few celebrity designers, to boot. And that entrance of Marc walking up the stairs with Amanda and his followers? Perfection. Michael Urie shows off just how much Vanessa William has taught him about strutting into a room.
Second Moment: Marc tells Betty she only won because she's Latina, and that being gay doesn't save him from being a white male. First off, let me just say damn. Few shows on TV right now has the balls to go there, but go there they did. And for a show that's been accused of playing it nice to their little Latina superstar and her family, Ugly Betty proves, once again, that the writers aren't afraid of letting the real world creep in on their brightly lit melodrama. And frankly, the scene couldn't have worked without Urie. Marc could have easily come off as a bigot, but instead, Urie manages to pull off reserved anger that's directed where it belongs: at a system that promotes the idea that diversity of skin color is more important than talent. (Don't get me started.) Urie excels at shoving Betty down a few pegs, but only by showing to her the reality of the situation. Marc did deserve it. Betty didn't.
Third Moment: That phone call banter between Betty and Marc at the very end. I think I've said it before (or at least, I've thought it) that truly, only Judith Light and Vanessa Williams could steal a scene from America Ferrara. Ferrara's Betty is simply too great a character matched with an actress born to play the role. But right there, that was Urie showing his Marc can play on Ferrera's level. And with both of them in the YETI program, I'm hoping this means more Marc and Betty interplay.
And throw in some Amanda for good measure.